tackling life as a real person in a foreign land

follow my travels as i work in frankfurt tackling both life as a real person and as an awkward foreign person...

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Alles Gute Amurika

July 4, 2011 will henceforth be known as the greatest birthday America's ever had. Why? Because me and my friends (so proud I can put an "s" at the end of that) celebrated it by being everything Europe considers American: classless, last-minute, and an embarrassment. Not only did we try to "plan" a "party" the day before we wanted to throw it, but we did it in a country that doesn't understand the need to have stores, of any kind, open 24/7. Or really, open on Sundays (presumably, Germans have enough sense/aren't spontaneous enough to not be able to make it through a Sunday without needing to go buy something). The following is a list of our top ten failures (or just a list of what happened, depending on how you look at it):

  1. Trying to find where we were going - this included a lot of gesturing and map looking
  2. Trying to find a grill at the "grill park"
  3. Deciding whether to approach the people using the only public grill to see if we could join
  4. Deciding we weren't bold enough
  5. Trying to light a lighter
  6. Trying to cook a hot dog on a fork with a lighter
  7. Trying to break half of a watermelon in half…because we didn't bring a knife
  8. Trying to open a beer bottle with a lighter, another bottle, and finally, a set of keys
  9. Trying to light our s'mores' marshmallows on fire, they wouldn't catch…probably because they were made out of plastic
  10. Using glows sticks as a substitute for sparklers

Notice the most often used word in this list is "try." You could have easily replaced it with "fail."

No comments:

Post a Comment